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Monday, January 17, 2011

Day 17

I and four college students went to the Gulf Coast Getaway this weekend.  The focus of the weekend was a renewed commitment to helping the "least of these".  Very powerful.  Very convicting.  Inspirational.  You pick the adjective.  Yet, I couldn't help wondering how I could continue to come to such "life changing" events and not see any substantial differences in my life long term?

........................

I wonder if I have equated emotionally moving responses too closely with the spiritual?  I don't think so.  This weekend definitely saw the movement of the spirit.  I think my difficulty is something else altogether.

Have you ever had a sudden desire to do something?  Play an instrument, rebuild an engine, prepare a culinary masterpiece?  You run off and start practicing and preparing.  But once you do it for a couple days you realize it doesn't happen with a snap of the fingers.  Its what Jesus talked about with counting the cost.  His yoke is "easy" but we tend to forget the cost is high.  We must sacrifice all.

I believe spiritual disciplines help us bridge the gap between the "wanting" and "doing".  I felt more convicted about God's ability to change me this weekend because of the brokenness and humility this gloriously difficult fasting experience has forced upon me.  I just can't make it through a day without God.  I feel the weight of this continually.  He is the only one who can bring me relief when my bodily desire to be satiated is so overwhelmingly strong.  

5:00pm weight 194lbs.

Still haven't decided when to switch to liquids.  I feel like I am finding a good pace physically though.  Maybe it was just the beach.

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